I am sitting at work exhausted. My flight was delayed last night due to rain and storms. I got in early this morning and when my alarm clock went off, I thought it was a cruel joke.
So the weekend with Toot was good for the most part. I’m not sure what it was, but it’s like the thrill has worn off for me. I found myself wanting to talk to Teddy more and more. All I could think of was that I wasn’t going to let Toot jeopardize the possibility of a future with someone else. It was actually quite funny, he was encouraging me to call Teddy while we were together but I wouldn’t humor him.
Meeting the family went just as I pictured it. They were just as he described them and I really enjoyed talking to his mother. There were a couple of awkward moments, including one where his mom made a statement saying that from all he had told her about me, she was surprised that he and I weren’t together. All I could do was sit there; I didn’t want to even comment on that.
Another moment came when he asked me to take off the ring he bought me and handed it to his mother. She was like, “oh when did you get this?” That is when I explained to her that he got me that back in May.
Toot and I talked about my move and a couple of other things but it just wasn’t really the same. I am actually quite relieved about all of this. When it was about time for me to leave, I told him that every time I see him, I think it will be the last time.
I really feel like Teddy has great potential and he’s at the same place I am I my life, unlike Toot. He and I have so many commonalities it makes me pause at times. I am trying to really be the person I was before I got my heart stomped on but sometimes it’s so hard. I know that I have to get over the past in order to have a successful future. The craziest part is that he has had his heart broken too so he also has his defenses up a bit. All I think is that can’t be good for us both to have them so I am making a conscious effort to slowly break away my fifteen foot wall.