Monday, May 23, 2011


So guess who texted me at 6:36am.....Teddy! It's funny because I mentioned in my last post that I had been praying for him because he had been on my heart.

Well in his text, he was saying he was writing for closure. Then he mentioned a position he was considering taking on the east coast so that he could move on from me and only space will allow that to happen. The texts went on for about a half hour. I'm still uncertain as to where we left things. Part of me says it's been six weeks, just wait six more and maybe I'll be over him, the other part of me says that him reaching out was huge so maybe this all means something.

In other news, camping was so much fun!! We had a great time, although sleeping in a tent was not a high point for me. Let me also say how filthy the bathrooms were, I can't believe women used them, it seemed more like a pack of animals. When I got home, I ran to the shower, it was sweet relief. There were a ton of couples on the camping trip, I admit that I wished that I had come as a part of a couple, but hanging with BeBe was cool as always.

There is nothing else really going on, I have still been on the hunt for a new job so we'll see what happens next.....

Wednesday, May 18, 2011


I've been trying to distract myself from thinking lately. I know to some, that may sound silly, but with my recently plague of insomnia, light-thinking has been allowing me to have restful nights. While I'm awake, I do think about the job situation, because that, I really can't control. I applied for fourteen jobs today and have a meeting with a placement agency tomorrow.

I'm going camping with BeBe and the girls this weekend. I asked Toot to borrow some camping equipment. He told me that I could borrow whatever I needed and asked me to call off work to hang with him and get the items. Well that day came and I couldn't take off. That fool Toot had the nerve to be mad and when I asked him about still using some of his camping gear, he said no. The fact that he had the nerve to tell me no when I've driven out of my way, through a thunderstorm to bring him money that he needed to borrow, pissed me off.

I went to a comedy show Saturday evening. The headliner was Lavelle Crawford and the opening act was named Spike Jackson. Let me tell you all, between those two men, I laughed until I cried. The laughter I got that night was just what the doctor ordered. When I'm sad, often times, I watch or listen to something funny to lift my spirits.

Last night I had a dream about Teddy. I think that the dream was because I prayed for him before I went to bed. Despite the way things ended between him and me, I still want only the best for him. I actually woke myself up from a dream for once. The dream had just started and in it my phone rang and I reached for it and saw that it was Teddy calling. I remembered thinking, this must be a dream, he's too proud to call me and just like that, I woke myself up.

What other ramblings???? I'm not sure if I told you guys but my sister officially moved to Arizona. I'm so proud of her and I am glad that she has followed her dream. One of my brothers teased that I turned her into a traitor since she left our hometown, my thing is, if being a traitor means doing what your heart desires, I'll be a traitor every time.

Friday, May 13, 2011

In the Meantime

There hasn't been really anything blog worthy to write about. Each day, I give myself a number and that's how many jobs I apply for. Want an example? Sure you want an example, Wednesday, I applied for 25 jobs and yesterday, 10. I took a break today but will be back on the hunt. I just started to feel drained in my job search but I will be back on it Monday.

Just in case anyone is wondering, I haven't spoken to Teddy. Most people have stopped asking if we've reconciled. How about my Mom asked my sister if she should tell my Pastor that the wedding is off? My sister told my Mom, well even if they did get back together, the wedding wouldn't be the same date, so yes. The craziest part is that I already told my Mother when I went home for Easter that she could cancel the church.

I've met a few guys, but they have all been either too freaking old or too young. I know that I probably shouldn't be worried about men at the moment but I'm not worried, just looking for a distraction at the moment.

Speaking of being worried about a man.....So the other day I asked my Texas Mom if she wanted to go to a comedy show, she said she'd let me know. Could someone tell me why she informed me that her husband would also be joining us? This is the second time that a married woman has done this to me. I just don't understand how married people think it's alright to just bring their spouse. I told my other coworker that I need to get a man so that I won't be a third wheel. I'm getting annoyed all over again. Anyway, after begging my other coworker to go, I am no longer the third wheel. I've been the third wheel before, but Texas Mom and husband are much older than I am and since I look young enough to get carded for Nyquil, I don't want to feel like I'm out with my parents.

I'm hoping for a good weekend, there's nothing better than a Friday night. I have plans to watch a couple of movies and just relax. I hope you all have a great weekend!