I mentioned in a previous post that I have made a really great buddy, BeBe. When Teddy and I were trying having our issues, she was there with advice but mainly, acclimating me to the city.
While we were hanging out, I saw more of the city than I had since I've been here. I barely have to use the GPS since she's shown me so many back streets. Living in the same neighborhood means that we do a lot of last minute plans and I have no problem with that because while I appreciate time at home, I also like to get out and enjoy life.
When I was younger and in a relationship, while I had the same best friends since elementary school, I saw them still, but totally immersed myself into my relationship with whatever boyfriend I was with. I had one boyfriend that would go to "Girl's Night Out" events, just to monopolize my time.
After getting a bit older and realizing how rude it was to tote boyfriends to every social event I attended, I found a happy medium for friendships vs. relationships.
I've only had one relationship to date, where I felt that the person I was in a relationship with had an equal playing field with their time for me and their friends.
This brings me to Teddy....He doesn't really have any friends. The friends he does have, he never sees and only talks on the phone with them every few months. He had a best friend but they fell out a few years back and he has recently tried to reach out to him, but the friend doesn't really seem to be interested. Teddy's repsonse is that's why he doesn't have friends, because you can't trust people.
I'm not naive and I've shared with you all the story about how my best friend slept with my boyfriend years ago, so I too, have been burned. Despite the fact that I've been betrayed, I am not closed off to making new friends. While I realize that everyone won't be your BFF, there's nothing wrong with having people to hang out with on occasion.
BeBe and I still hang out and Teddy seems to not like it all that much. He won't come out and say it but I've asked him and he said "go out and have a good time." While he is far from controlling, I think that he's jealous that I have someone to hang out with that's my age, whereas before I was really just hanging out with the older ladies from work.
I never ditch him to hang out with her but there are times that I go out at night with her and that cuts into Teddy and my phone time. Sometimes I'll see her several times a week. The other day she had a watch party for "The Game." She invited me and her other friends over and we all brought a dish, they had drinks, desserts and I even brought my Wii. Her friends and I just get along and that's a huge plus for me.
I'm not sure if any of you have ever heard of a movie called, "I love you, Man," but it was about a man who had no friends who was trying to meet guys so he would have friends. I put the movie in for Teddy to watch and he was so uncomfortable that I ended up turning the movie off. While I don't want him to blow me off to hang out with his buddies, I think it'd be healthy that he had some friends to hang out with.
I guess the fact that he doesn't have friends wouldn't be so bad if he didn't seem slighted whenever I hung out. Like I said, he says that he is happy that I've made friends because he knows that I'm social, but that he's more of a homebody and would rather stay in.
Have any of you ever encountered anything like this?