Today, I got three calls to come in for interviews....sounds good right? Well that would be great news if I could hop on the Magic S.chool Bus and have it get me to Texas. All three companies wanted me to come in this week. Not only are the last minute flights priced ridiculously high but I am not allowed to take off work for three weeks because it is our busy season. If I call in sick, I will most definitely get written up and I would have to produce a doctor's note.
I started off today really happy and hopeful. I am trying to look on the bright side that at least there are companies interested in me, but at the same time, I'm still pretty mad that I can't take any of the interviews.
Part of me wants to just give my two weeks notice now and then reality sets in. With a very small savings and no job lined up, only a fool would quit there job in hopes of getting an interview.
It doesn't help that Aunt Flo is trying to visit me and I'm heading out of town this weekend. I just need to regroup.
Monday, August 24, 2009
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Get A Life
So I’m sitting at work dog tired and fantasizing about a nap. It’s almost noon and in walks my supervisor. She’s been on “vacation” this week but has still been calling me asking me to do work related favors.
Who on earth would come in on a Thursday when they have been off since the prior week?? She really needs to get a life. She loves the attention and it’s so irritating.
There is someone else at work that I would like to get a life. That person is the custodian for my department. He cries and whines like a baby when we throw toner in the garbage. Allegedly, the toner is detrimental to the health of the human body…so why do you want me to throw it away Mr. Custodian?
He has been causing ruckus on my entire floor about these damn toner cartridges. So being the Office Manager, people have decided that they’ll give ME the cartridges since he always complains to them when they place them in the trash. So a coworker has her staff person give me a used cartridge. Irritated and sleep-deprived I asked my coworker if she wanted me to take the toner home with me.
People are just so lazy and will do as little as possible and many people here get away with that. I on the other hand am bombarded with stuff to do everyday and if I don’t drop everything and wipe their noses and say coddle them, they have a fit.
I have one more person to add to the get a life list. This homeless pan approached me while I filled up for gas before heading to work asking me if I’d like him to pump it and I responded, “no.” After thinking over my response he informed me that he’d like a honey bun and some milk. My eyes almost popped out of my head. I work everyday and I haven’t had breakfast, what do I look like taking requests from someone who begs all day.
I ended up telling him to back up because he was too close. In the meantime, the gas station attendant got on the speaker telling the man to leave the premises. The pump I was at didn’t work so I asked her if the pump was broke and she said “no, I just don’t want him at this gas station.” “Lady, I don’t want him here either”, I thought to myself. Homeless guy decides to go in and have a shouting match with the attendant. I got in the car and left without gas. Too much idiocy for one morning!!
Who on earth would come in on a Thursday when they have been off since the prior week?? She really needs to get a life. She loves the attention and it’s so irritating.
There is someone else at work that I would like to get a life. That person is the custodian for my department. He cries and whines like a baby when we throw toner in the garbage. Allegedly, the toner is detrimental to the health of the human body…so why do you want me to throw it away Mr. Custodian?
He has been causing ruckus on my entire floor about these damn toner cartridges. So being the Office Manager, people have decided that they’ll give ME the cartridges since he always complains to them when they place them in the trash. So a coworker has her staff person give me a used cartridge. Irritated and sleep-deprived I asked my coworker if she wanted me to take the toner home with me.
People are just so lazy and will do as little as possible and many people here get away with that. I on the other hand am bombarded with stuff to do everyday and if I don’t drop everything and wipe their noses and say coddle them, they have a fit.
I have one more person to add to the get a life list. This homeless pan approached me while I filled up for gas before heading to work asking me if I’d like him to pump it and I responded, “no.” After thinking over my response he informed me that he’d like a honey bun and some milk. My eyes almost popped out of my head. I work everyday and I haven’t had breakfast, what do I look like taking requests from someone who begs all day.
I ended up telling him to back up because he was too close. In the meantime, the gas station attendant got on the speaker telling the man to leave the premises. The pump I was at didn’t work so I asked her if the pump was broke and she said “no, I just don’t want him at this gas station.” “Lady, I don’t want him here either”, I thought to myself. Homeless guy decides to go in and have a shouting match with the attendant. I got in the car and left without gas. Too much idiocy for one morning!!
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
They Always Come Back
That's a phrase that my sister and I use in terms of men. They never seem to fully move on with their lives, at some point they always throw out a line to see if we'll bite. This has been an ongoing thing with me since I was a teenager. JT still calls to check up on me from time to time and we always wish each other a happy birthday and its been 12 years.
Its something about not letting people go from my life. Now I don't talk to Scott anymore but a couple other exes do still call to see how I'm doing from time to time. I have a point to all this, don't worry.
Toot and I have been back talking. Surprised? Probably not. I told you guys that I saw him last month and we've been talking still. I really tried to not deal with him but there is some kind of energy between us that makes his presence always wanted. I'm not crazy, I know that the situation we have is still very much present but its like, I really don't care at this point.
It's reckless, I know. My emotions are under control for the most part, even though at times, knowing that there's a possibility that we'll never get together sometimes would make me sad.
We are both very open about whats going on in our lives, so I told him about a guy that I've been talking to. He was jealous, it was a bit cute. The last guy that I met, he didn't seem to care about at all but that's probably because he knew I wasn't feeling the guy like that.
I can't be a hypocrite and blast on him for being a little mad that I met someone. I say that because I'm guilty of being that way in the past myself. I think a lot of us have been guilty of not being with someone but not wanting them to be with anyone else.
So jokingly yesterday he asked me if the new guy and I were married yet. I laughed and dismissed his silly question. He has been making even more of an effort to talk now and has done a couple of grand gestures. I asked him what has brought all this on and he said "this new guy you're talking to, I can't let him take you away from me."
The truth is though that the new guy I met, there is something special about him. We always find ourselves laughing and just enjoying each other. He seems to have all that I'm looking for in a potential partner and he has expressed the same interest in me. I know that I really like him because when he and I are on the phone and Toot calls, he gets first priority and I tell Toot that I'll call him when I'm done or if it's late, I don't click over at all, I just call him after I'm off.
There was a time when I'd get off the phone with my own mother to talk to him but things seem to be evolving. Now here is where I contradict myself...despite the fact that I have another interest, I let him talk me into taking a trip together next week. Right, crazy. I haven't told anyone about this and possibly its because I know that I'm wrong and really don't care to be lectured.
I did tell him that I still intend on talking to the new guy at night so he better deal with it. I know that at some point, I will have to stop him from trying to be apart of my life, but for now, that time hasn't come.
Its something about not letting people go from my life. Now I don't talk to Scott anymore but a couple other exes do still call to see how I'm doing from time to time. I have a point to all this, don't worry.
Toot and I have been back talking. Surprised? Probably not. I told you guys that I saw him last month and we've been talking still. I really tried to not deal with him but there is some kind of energy between us that makes his presence always wanted. I'm not crazy, I know that the situation we have is still very much present but its like, I really don't care at this point.
It's reckless, I know. My emotions are under control for the most part, even though at times, knowing that there's a possibility that we'll never get together sometimes would make me sad.
We are both very open about whats going on in our lives, so I told him about a guy that I've been talking to. He was jealous, it was a bit cute. The last guy that I met, he didn't seem to care about at all but that's probably because he knew I wasn't feeling the guy like that.
I can't be a hypocrite and blast on him for being a little mad that I met someone. I say that because I'm guilty of being that way in the past myself. I think a lot of us have been guilty of not being with someone but not wanting them to be with anyone else.
So jokingly yesterday he asked me if the new guy and I were married yet. I laughed and dismissed his silly question. He has been making even more of an effort to talk now and has done a couple of grand gestures. I asked him what has brought all this on and he said "this new guy you're talking to, I can't let him take you away from me."
The truth is though that the new guy I met, there is something special about him. We always find ourselves laughing and just enjoying each other. He seems to have all that I'm looking for in a potential partner and he has expressed the same interest in me. I know that I really like him because when he and I are on the phone and Toot calls, he gets first priority and I tell Toot that I'll call him when I'm done or if it's late, I don't click over at all, I just call him after I'm off.
There was a time when I'd get off the phone with my own mother to talk to him but things seem to be evolving. Now here is where I contradict myself...despite the fact that I have another interest, I let him talk me into taking a trip together next week. Right, crazy. I haven't told anyone about this and possibly its because I know that I'm wrong and really don't care to be lectured.
I did tell him that I still intend on talking to the new guy at night so he better deal with it. I know that at some point, I will have to stop him from trying to be apart of my life, but for now, that time hasn't come.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
BFF Betrayal (Conclusion)
He already knew something was up when he came outside because I was enraged. His story was that she was making all of that up and it never happened. See, LSE had been diagnosed with Schizophrenia the year that all this happened, she was institutionalized for a good two months. He was so manipulative that he tried to use her illness as a means of getting out what he had actually done. I still didn’t think that this was an acceptable excuse for her to get out of it. I felt that she wasn’t all that crazy because she hid what she was doing and kept it a secret for four years. I guess after so much time had passed, he felt that he’d be able to take his secret to the grave.
I was in his face in the street yelling and screaming and he told my friend to get me and take me home. I had my finger in his face, pushing and poking him, asking him if she didn’t take me home, what exactly was he going to do to me?!
In retrospect, it was too much of a show to give the neighbors and too much satisfaction to give him, seeing that I was so upset. He even tried to say that the only reason LSE had come forth with these details was because she knew he and I had been talking about getting back together.
Sometimes I wish that I’d never known about the betrayal and pain she caused me. I was a mess during finals. I couldn’t sleep, eat and all I could do was cry. I felt like one of my best friends had literally died.
The worse part about the whole ordeal is that I still have to see her on occasions because my other three BFFs are still friends with her. They support the mental illness claim and are still very much apart of each other’s lives. I, on the other hand only deal with her when I had to. For a split moment last night, while sitting next to her at dinner, I had a flashback to the incident but with the help of a Raspberry Margarita, I quickly shook those thoughts.
As for Scott, unfortunately I ran into him three years ago. He actually had gotten married and his wife was there. She told me how she had heard so much about me and was pleased to meet me. I sat there wondering what the hell she had I actually heard. I felt bad for her because they only dated a year and she had no idea what she had gotten herself into. I was looking extra good that day, I had just left a wedding, but too bad I couldn’t say the same for him. Luckily for him, the wedding reception had an open bar or I think we would have had round two at D&B. He had put some kind of curl kit in his hair and picked up a good fifty pounds. He literally ran up to me and picked me up. I was cordial and spoke to him for a few minutes.
Scott couldn’t get over how nice I was and how great I looked. I told him that he acted like I was a mean, ugly monster when we were together, to which he said well……At that point, I snapped on him telling him he have me more than enough reason to behave the way I acted with him. He froze and said you’re right. To add creepiness to the mix, he asked me if I still stayed at my parents because every time that he rode by, he never saw my car. Um…why are you looking for my car? Finally, I had had enough socializing with him and we parted ways.
Oddly enough, about six months later, my sister was on an online personals page and ran across his profile stating he was on there “looking for love.” Knowing him, his wife had no clue what he was up to. Ladies, please take the time to get to know these men before you say “I DO.”
I was in his face in the street yelling and screaming and he told my friend to get me and take me home. I had my finger in his face, pushing and poking him, asking him if she didn’t take me home, what exactly was he going to do to me?!
In retrospect, it was too much of a show to give the neighbors and too much satisfaction to give him, seeing that I was so upset. He even tried to say that the only reason LSE had come forth with these details was because she knew he and I had been talking about getting back together.
Sometimes I wish that I’d never known about the betrayal and pain she caused me. I was a mess during finals. I couldn’t sleep, eat and all I could do was cry. I felt like one of my best friends had literally died.
The worse part about the whole ordeal is that I still have to see her on occasions because my other three BFFs are still friends with her. They support the mental illness claim and are still very much apart of each other’s lives. I, on the other hand only deal with her when I had to. For a split moment last night, while sitting next to her at dinner, I had a flashback to the incident but with the help of a Raspberry Margarita, I quickly shook those thoughts.
As for Scott, unfortunately I ran into him three years ago. He actually had gotten married and his wife was there. She told me how she had heard so much about me and was pleased to meet me. I sat there wondering what the hell she had I actually heard. I felt bad for her because they only dated a year and she had no idea what she had gotten herself into. I was looking extra good that day, I had just left a wedding, but too bad I couldn’t say the same for him. Luckily for him, the wedding reception had an open bar or I think we would have had round two at D&B. He had put some kind of curl kit in his hair and picked up a good fifty pounds. He literally ran up to me and picked me up. I was cordial and spoke to him for a few minutes.
Scott couldn’t get over how nice I was and how great I looked. I told him that he acted like I was a mean, ugly monster when we were together, to which he said well……At that point, I snapped on him telling him he have me more than enough reason to behave the way I acted with him. He froze and said you’re right. To add creepiness to the mix, he asked me if I still stayed at my parents because every time that he rode by, he never saw my car. Um…why are you looking for my car? Finally, I had had enough socializing with him and we parted ways.
Oddly enough, about six months later, my sister was on an online personals page and ran across his profile stating he was on there “looking for love.” Knowing him, his wife had no clue what he was up to. Ladies, please take the time to get to know these men before you say “I DO.”
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
BFF Betrayal (Part 2)
I would later come to find out that he didn’t have his degree by some fluke. Apparently, he took classes while he was in the military oversees and in a classroom where he was stationed. Somewhere along the lines, his ship courses never got sent to the campus so he had all these gaps and missing prereqs for certain courses. I had never heard of anyone else who had this kind of situation. To make matters worse he admittedly told me that his mother did have another child but she had given her up for adoption.
The month I was to graduate, to be more precise, the week of finals, my BFF, LSE ( Low Self-Esteem) decided to come clean with me that she and Scott had sex four years earlier while he and I were together and that he took her virginity. Again, I had another moment where I just lost it. She actually called me over to her house and had a friend there (in case I jumped on her and wouldn't get off I'm assuming.) You didn't need back up when you were doing your dirt, but now you need it to come clean?
I didn’t know who I was more mad at, her my friend of over 10 years or him. I was then and to this day am one of those women who takes it up with my man for cheating, not trying to find the other woman and release my frustration on her. But seeing as though she was my best friend, they both felt my wrath.
I told her how she acted so holier than thou to all of us telling, saying that fornicating was wrong and how we were sinners. She was also lecturing another of the BFFs about how she shouldn’t be the other woman. When all her dirt came out, she claims that’s why she felt she could give advice because she was the other woman. I told her she was nothing but some @ss. He never did anything with nor for her. He took advantage of a gullible, no confidence having hoe. There was more but I won’t go into all the specifics.
As far as him, I tried calling that night but it was late and he had already went to bed. So the next morning I told him I wanted to come over, he had just moved in with his aunt. My family tried talking me out of confronting him and even blocked me in the driveway so that I didn’t make matters worse. I drove across the grass and took my girl with me and on came the confrontation.....
The month I was to graduate, to be more precise, the week of finals, my BFF, LSE ( Low Self-Esteem) decided to come clean with me that she and Scott had sex four years earlier while he and I were together and that he took her virginity. Again, I had another moment where I just lost it. She actually called me over to her house and had a friend there (in case I jumped on her and wouldn't get off I'm assuming.) You didn't need back up when you were doing your dirt, but now you need it to come clean?
I didn’t know who I was more mad at, her my friend of over 10 years or him. I was then and to this day am one of those women who takes it up with my man for cheating, not trying to find the other woman and release my frustration on her. But seeing as though she was my best friend, they both felt my wrath.
I told her how she acted so holier than thou to all of us telling, saying that fornicating was wrong and how we were sinners. She was also lecturing another of the BFFs about how she shouldn’t be the other woman. When all her dirt came out, she claims that’s why she felt she could give advice because she was the other woman. I told her she was nothing but some @ss. He never did anything with nor for her. He took advantage of a gullible, no confidence having hoe. There was more but I won’t go into all the specifics.
As far as him, I tried calling that night but it was late and he had already went to bed. So the next morning I told him I wanted to come over, he had just moved in with his aunt. My family tried talking me out of confronting him and even blocked me in the driveway so that I didn’t make matters worse. I drove across the grass and took my girl with me and on came the confrontation.....
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
BFF Betrayal (Part 1)
Last night I went to dinner with my BFFs since elementary school. We were known as the Fab 5, totally inseparable. But as it happense most times, there was a wrench thrown into the great wheel of friendship. Unfortunately, I was the vicitim of betrayal by one of my besties.
After dealing with the hell that JT put me through, the man I met after him, Scott, was like a warm spring day. He was so doting, affectionate and giving. He persued me and eventually won my heart. Scott was all the things that JT wasn't. He had a degree, no kids and had been in the military. He was an only child that rarely saw his family so the fact that my family was so big worked well because he enjoyed hanging out with us.
Slowly, but surely, things began to fall apart right before me. I had a pregnancy scare and as we discussed the possibilities of "if we were parents," he decided at that time to reply, "What do you mean IF, I have two kids."
I don't really remember much else of what happened after that, I truly think I had an out of body experience. We were at I.HOP and I was in there acting a complete fool. Everyone was looking at us, but like I said, I wasn't me, so I couldn't help myself.
Eventually he got me in the car and tried to calm me down but there was nothing that he could say at that point. He dropped me off at home and let me cool down, but that didn't work. I went home crying to my mother that I thought I was pregnant and how he was such a liar.
In true form, her way of consoling me was informing me that if I was, I would have to move out of her and my dad's house. I was devastated. I was pouring my heart out to her and all she could say was how in the midst of all that was going wrong, that I could add homelessness to the list. I was 19 and a sophomore in college, I was working but it wasn’t enough to really set out on my own.
It was at that point, that I decided that I knew for certain that I couldn’t share everything with my mom like a lot of my friends. I had always hoped that we could have an honest, open relationship but her reaction confirmed that certain things parents shouldn’t know...
Anyway, stupidly, I took him back after a while. I would later come to find out.....
After dealing with the hell that JT put me through, the man I met after him, Scott, was like a warm spring day. He was so doting, affectionate and giving. He persued me and eventually won my heart. Scott was all the things that JT wasn't. He had a degree, no kids and had been in the military. He was an only child that rarely saw his family so the fact that my family was so big worked well because he enjoyed hanging out with us.
Slowly, but surely, things began to fall apart right before me. I had a pregnancy scare and as we discussed the possibilities of "if we were parents," he decided at that time to reply, "What do you mean IF, I have two kids."
I don't really remember much else of what happened after that, I truly think I had an out of body experience. We were at I.HOP and I was in there acting a complete fool. Everyone was looking at us, but like I said, I wasn't me, so I couldn't help myself.
Eventually he got me in the car and tried to calm me down but there was nothing that he could say at that point. He dropped me off at home and let me cool down, but that didn't work. I went home crying to my mother that I thought I was pregnant and how he was such a liar.
In true form, her way of consoling me was informing me that if I was, I would have to move out of her and my dad's house. I was devastated. I was pouring my heart out to her and all she could say was how in the midst of all that was going wrong, that I could add homelessness to the list. I was 19 and a sophomore in college, I was working but it wasn’t enough to really set out on my own.
It was at that point, that I decided that I knew for certain that I couldn’t share everything with my mom like a lot of my friends. I had always hoped that we could have an honest, open relationship but her reaction confirmed that certain things parents shouldn’t know...
Anyway, stupidly, I took him back after a while. I would later come to find out.....
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Let's Get Ready to Rumble
Just when I thought that I would finally have some peace in the house, here comes more headaches. So my little brother has decided to stay in the States and work. His wife has been IM-ing & calling me to vent. There is only so much I want to say since I am really trying not to get back caught up in their ridiculous fights.
It's so sad because yesterday she made a comment about no matter how much they fight verbally and physically, they both know neither of them are going anywhere. I just sat there with my face semi-twisted.
Ok back to the reason for this post. I'm not sure if you all will believe me but in some ways my brother is actually worse than my sister. I thought I'd finally be able to live in a clean house and here he comes, The Tasmanian Devil. I swear, you'd think he was a stripper the way he has clothes all over the house. He'll have shorts in the livingroom, underwear in the bathroom, a t-shirt in the office, its like WHAT THE HELL!
I was trying to just be cool until he left which was scheduled for this coming Sunday. But since I heard from my mother today that he is supposed to be staying, I HAVE to say something to him before I attack him.
Last night and another night a week or so ago, he left the doors unlocked. While I don't live in the worse neighborhood, I don't live in the best either. I live off of a major street and there is an alley at the corner. I thought that I'd be a bit more comfortable having a male presence in the house but I was safer with just me because I made sure the doors were locked every night.
I mentioned to him last time how I was upset that the doors were left unlocked and he turned around and did it again last night. I started writing a note before I left out this morning but I decided we need to talk one-on-one.
The day before yesterday I took the trash out and was in a hurry. He was home all day but do you think he put another bag in the trash can? Of course not. I finally had to say something to him about it. He started to say something but decided to let his voice trail off instead. Perhaps he remembered that I give him money from time to time and I have let him use my car on numerous occasions since he's been back.
Well he put the bag in the can..I should be happy, right? Wrong! Why didn't he pick up the trash that he had piling up on the counter? He didn't because he's lazy, that's why. He also hasn't washed a dish since he's been there and he leaves loads full on the counter and in the computer room. He doesn't even has the decency to rinse off the dishes he uses, he lets them set and harden before dropping them off on the counter for me to wash.
I have a hair appointment tonight and when I get home, I am going to lay things out for him. If he doesn't help out, he has to go, flat out. I'm tired of cleaning up behind grown folks. The decision is up to me if he stays or goes and I refuse to clean up behing his lazy a$$ anymore.
It's so sad because yesterday she made a comment about no matter how much they fight verbally and physically, they both know neither of them are going anywhere. I just sat there with my face semi-twisted.
Ok back to the reason for this post. I'm not sure if you all will believe me but in some ways my brother is actually worse than my sister. I thought I'd finally be able to live in a clean house and here he comes, The Tasmanian Devil. I swear, you'd think he was a stripper the way he has clothes all over the house. He'll have shorts in the livingroom, underwear in the bathroom, a t-shirt in the office, its like WHAT THE HELL!
I was trying to just be cool until he left which was scheduled for this coming Sunday. But since I heard from my mother today that he is supposed to be staying, I HAVE to say something to him before I attack him.
Last night and another night a week or so ago, he left the doors unlocked. While I don't live in the worse neighborhood, I don't live in the best either. I live off of a major street and there is an alley at the corner. I thought that I'd be a bit more comfortable having a male presence in the house but I was safer with just me because I made sure the doors were locked every night.
I mentioned to him last time how I was upset that the doors were left unlocked and he turned around and did it again last night. I started writing a note before I left out this morning but I decided we need to talk one-on-one.
The day before yesterday I took the trash out and was in a hurry. He was home all day but do you think he put another bag in the trash can? Of course not. I finally had to say something to him about it. He started to say something but decided to let his voice trail off instead. Perhaps he remembered that I give him money from time to time and I have let him use my car on numerous occasions since he's been back.
Well he put the bag in the can..I should be happy, right? Wrong! Why didn't he pick up the trash that he had piling up on the counter? He didn't because he's lazy, that's why. He also hasn't washed a dish since he's been there and he leaves loads full on the counter and in the computer room. He doesn't even has the decency to rinse off the dishes he uses, he lets them set and harden before dropping them off on the counter for me to wash.
I have a hair appointment tonight and when I get home, I am going to lay things out for him. If he doesn't help out, he has to go, flat out. I'm tired of cleaning up behind grown folks. The decision is up to me if he stays or goes and I refuse to clean up behing his lazy a$$ anymore.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)